Grown In Life... And Love

Well, it has been a fair few years i do apologize. I seemed to have been so caught up in things recently that I completely forgot to let you all know what has been going on!

Where to start! From the last post I guess.
My Girlfriend's got to hear about the encounter with the Hot Italian Chick and they was shocked but in a nice way! they seemed to enjoy the idea of how intense and spontaneous it was more than who it was with! Phew! Was a tad worried but least they have let me know it is cool either way as long as i am happy..

I am still in the Nursery, now Deputy Manager now.. Since working there for so long, and the last Deputy Manager left after having a child.. was only fitting to see about stepping in!
I work hard and play just as... well, more fun than hard really! But still single. Although, there is one....

His name is Ed, mid 40's and has a couple of kids from ex some yrs ago.. I've know his guy since i was young! moved in few doors down from family home some yrs back! i was only just hitting my teens and he was already dating someone n soon moved out. But I've known him and the family for yrs! But he's started to show up in my Local Haunts. So we got chatting again and it got to the point where we was acting like teenagers that like each other in school! poking and teasing each other. One of my friends pulled me to one side and asked if i liked him, cos he likes me.
"Don't be Daft! I've known him for yrs!! he doesn't like me that much!" as i shrugged her off and went back to finish my drink.

I did notice that first night of seeing him, he was so eager to get me on my own. To the point that if i went to the loo, he was waiting at the door! If i went to find my friends and would be back to him, he would come with me! Holding my hand, caressing my bottom and ensuring I had a drink even when I had one! He is sweet but i am not sure if i am ready to change my life being with a guy. Am too happy right now to spoil it..

I know i seem to have skipped quite a lot but honestly, nothing much else happened to report to you! Living alone is fun, parties, sleep overs, odd guy or 3! but nothing out of the ordinary... that is worth writing about anyway!

Right, think it is time for bed.. well some sleep! I have a few things i need to sort out for Valentines Day.. Keep Posted!

Emailed

So, I have been busy over the past few hours.. Thinking and finally getting on with it. Flower...

Yes, Emailed her back after a few months of debating and getting away from it all.. For someone who doesn't have any REAL drama in life. I really do know how to make something out of nothing! So emailed her back saying that things for me were different now.. I am now officially Bi and had met someone on holiday. But have missed her and our chats. Really was a great friend.
Don't think that would go down too well with her but to be fair, we couldn't have any kind of relationship with her being overseas. The only thing that could happen is me having a holiday over there and same for her over here! What kind of relationship is that then?? Like visiting Family. But sleeping together and NOT being related. Shame really as things could have been quite nice between us. Never would have worked!

Honestly with me not knowing if I even liked women let alone had been with one.. how was I to know let alone her..? Now my head is waffling and so is my blog.. ugh

Thought more about Bianca - WOW! All I can say to that really.. heehee! Do think that has definately made me more comfy being with women more now. So now onto telling my girls..! Oh goodness how are they going to take it!? Never crossed our thoughts about lesbians or gays before.. not even in conversations!! Wierd really. We talk about practically everything! But thinking about it, 'That' conversation never has come up.

Well being friends with them for many years, I'm sure they will accept it, me. Hope!

Time Out - X Rated!

Well have been taking time out. I know, have been on and off here for some time now! But can you blame me..? Got so much going on that even I have to take time out!

So have been on holiday with the girls! And it was fun!! For the most part. they all ended up either flirting madly with the flirty italian guys or getting off with them. I was soo no interested. Mean REALLY not interested! One night out they were all over some guys and I just wondered off for a bit.. Down the bustling street to some bar down a quiet side road. Curious as to what was there I popped my head in to find all women sat in there.. Soft music, Low, candle light and smell of perfume and sweat in the air.

Made my way to the bar, looking around at the place. Not too big yet not tiny either.. finally felt at home there! Wierd really.. Ordered a small drink and sipped slowly at the cool glass. Someone come up next to me and ordered a drink, i looked up to find them looking me up and down. sussing me out I presume.
"New here?" she said.
I responded telling her I was on holiday with friends but they were busy with a bunch of guys so wasn't interested. She smiled and had a little chuckle.
"So you left them to come to a Gay Bar..?" Giving a wink to me and slight poke of her tongue on her top lip.
A GAY BAR!?? woah....! Never been before and had no idea it was! thought it could have been a quiet place that men didnt liek to go due to it being that.. quiet! I stutttered as I tried to say I had no idea..
"No worries! Can sniff 'Straight' a mile off! I'm Bianca, Lovely to meet you in here!"

We chatted at the bar and had quite a bit of a giggle of me finding this place and how I felt at home.. lol

Soon it started to get a bit too late ot be hanging around there as my friends would be wondering where I had gone... Or not been bothered! So Bianca fancied a walk and we headed out of the bar. Walking past the place I had left them before, there was no sign of them.. So as been as the night was still 'young' I mentioned a club I wanted to try out. Bianca told me that it wasn't that good and suggested a great place she goes all the time. Finding this club wasn't that hard really and it really was a great place! She said that it wasn't 'gay' but many do go there. Which in a way was fine really. It wouldn't have bothered me that much to be fair as I'm comfy with anyone who prefers anyone.. heehee!!

Hot, Sweaty, Heavy Breathing, Happy Panting, Drink Going Down - Really was the best... And yet I found myself staring at her as she was dancing and her Shirt was undone. Bright red bra on with swaet dripping down her chest. Brests perked up and nipples showing through.. I just couldnt help myself.. we stared at each other as we were moving together, closer and the sweat running over us. i caressed her hips and she ran her hands over my chest..

WOW it was that intense! MY very first encounter with a woman and it was with a hot italian chick!

She took me by the hand and dragged me to the ladies.. Guessing what was coming next I became soo wet and horny! She threw me into the cubicle and slammed the door behind her. I pinned her to the wall and sparks flew! Hot, passionate, heavy kisses felt more like fireworks yet at the same time soft and gentle. I soon pulled her bra straps down and gently nibbled on her nipples. I could feel her hand moving down her body and into her wet undies. She couldn't wait any longer.. I pulled my head back up she pushed me to the toilet and knelt down in front of me. undone my trousers and slowly let them drop to the floor. As I stood there eager for the outcome, I stared to drip ever more. She placed one of my legs up on the toilet seat so i was fully open to her and she buried her head into me. PHEW... It's getting hot in here!

Well, Soon after, I told her that it was my first time.. She could tell yet was a little suprised at how relaxed at it I was. Phone numbers were swapped and we parted ways.. I hadn't contacted her since then. Nothing was mentioned to my friends either as have no idea how they would react.. Not that they would be disgusted! But witht eh fact I was being goody two shoes the whole holiday, would have been shocked at what had happened.. lmao!


So, Wonder what to do now..?

Totally Spaced

Today has been a very weird day.. Have been to work, got home, eaten, washed and even got in front of the TV and got all my soaps watched. And I can’t remember doing any of it! I have no idea what I have done today or how I done any of it but it got done and now I’m here typing this out to you..
I’ve been not thinking about the one thing I don’t want to think about.. yet think that was why everything else was getting done and don’t remember doing any of it.. Cos I was thinking of it.
So…… Really do need to get something done about it but think that talking about it might help a bit. But who to talk to..? No-one knows about it really.. well not my friends or family.. only you lot on here know about it! So maybe here you can help me out with it.

I have no idea what to do or say or think really…. Mind just does not compute and it is giving me a headache.. I’m curious about what is going on.. and about her in particular but really do I fancy having a go with her being so far away from me..? I can’t even remember where she was from now it has been that long ago.. think I mentioned it here somewhere but will have to trawl through all my posts.. lol
I have been quite randy lately and it has been getting to the point that dreams have been the sort you wake from and really wished you hadn’t!! Yet finding that tingling feeling that won’t go without intervention… I won’t get into anything more really heehee!! And so since the message from Flower, I haven’t or remember what I dreamt of last night.. and so have been in a bit of a spaced out, weird place right now..
So…! What shall I do..??

Such A Great Weekend

Have really been relaxed and chilled this weekend and it has been sheer bliss! Do wonder why it happened but it did and soo glad it did really! But got into work this morning with the biggest smile on my face and a skip in my step that nothing could ruin my day… not even being lumbered with the naughty children or the day. they all behaved themselves and enjoyed their day with me! Was great!!!
Even the boss ( who is usually always grumpy!) was with a smile on her face.. after a nice chat with me of course! LOL Which was great for the others as they ended up enjoying today as well with everyone in a good mood it rubbed off on everyone!
Got home and ended up getting myself food from the chippy, sat in front of the laptop and found an email from Flower… which kind of wiped the smile off my face. The email was titled ‘Thinking of you…’ Which made my skin go all goosepimply and a shudder over my body. I really didn’t know what to do really.. I sat there in front of my laptop with my emails open and staring at the message flashing at me saying New Message!
Shall I open it?! Delete it and forget all about it and her..? But what has she said..? Why is she back after this long from leaving me a while ago..? Well there is only one way to sort this out..
“ Hello there my darling,
I have been sorting things out and finally have got things sorted out.. No more ex after me now, she has moved away and says she doesn’t want to hear from me again.. she was the one calling me! But now she has gone I have finally stopped thinking about you.. Only because I am finally writing to you.
So how have you been doing? What has gone on? Things your end going well? Do hope that things between us haven’t died. I do enjoy your company.. Even if it has been over the internet.. Has been too quiet.
Well, I bet you are wondering.. Why I have got back in contact again. There is one easy answer really… I wish to be able to pick up from where we left it before. If that is how you feel also.. God i bet that your mind is wondering what to do right now.
I do hope that you will at least say hi to me.. if not and I don’t hear back from you then I totally accept it and will not get in contact again.. Do hope that you do though x
Flower”

So……… What do I say!??

Party Mood!!

So love having the house to myself… No Flatmates, No Family, No Friends over..just me! So got scrubbed n cleaned house up a bit.. Now on here with old skool tunes on Music channels! Soo want to get a drink n Get ready to go out! But, haven’t planned to go out tonight and don’t know if anyone is out..
checking another font out.. this one is called Lesser Concern which is really small on normal size 12 but I’ve got it up to 18 and it looks quite cool really! Think will stick to this one as it suits my blog don’t you think?!
So, back to going out.. Well thinking of going out even if no-one is out tonight as really getting in the mood with all these old skool tunage on TV. Insomnia u=is on right now and before that was classic Gold Dust DJ Fresh. such a best beat to get you going during the dull and wet day….
Do you think that 3.15pm is too early for a little tipple..?

Up Tonight/Today….

Well it is now Saturday and ended up staying up watching TV for a few hours and a Nice Cold One beside me. Stand up mainly.. Which is great for when you are being a boring Git and stopping in enjoying a quiet one.
So here I am thinking about what I want to write on here.. lol Got fiddling with fonts this evening and found quite a few I liked. Thought I’d have a lookie at what they were like on a blog.. Do hope it looks ok. If you can’t read it let me know will try a different one!!
1001freefonts.com is where I got some of the fonts from.. really cool stuff there really. And free! lol Always the best..

I wonder what I will do when I wake later on..? Hmm.. Tidy house? enjoy weather if we have any nice weather to enjoy!? Dunno….

Weekend Fast Approaches!

The weekend has been taking too long to get here and now today will drag soo much for me! Had my day off today. Which wasn’t planned but with many of the kids in my room having the day off with family, I get to go home and enjoy it also! Which is great!! I love my kids very much so but do love the parents more.. They do enjoy their children so have them more than we do which is how it should be!
Well I have been getting back into my chatting again since it has all changed.

It works like this..

• Buy Percentage Points and these equal cash at the end of the month.. 1 point = 1 credit/$1
• 500 lines = 1 credit/$1
• Payment is via AlertPay at the end of each month
• Beginning of every month you must be active each day for 10 days to become Eligible for payment.
• When you click on Detailed Statistics at the top of the World Room chat room, click the adverts on there and click back to return to the stats page again and click another advert… do this a few times a day everyday to help everyone raise the earnings for us to be able to do less lines to earn more.

I have been put off quite a bit but do hope that it works out now that it has been nearly 2 months now. They want to promote it as your ‘Online Job’ which for me, doesn’t really work out too well. The currency being weaker than ££ it means that $1 = £0.60p and that can get me a can of pop!
But I do hope that I can be able to post here to all that they do pay again, it can be a great investment and we can all enjoy chatting together and hopefully be able to earn quite a bit from being online for a few hours a day.

Slipped Up After It Going SOO Well!

What can I say…? I’ve found something to be doing and forgot all about updating you guys!! But now I am back for however long to let you all know the in’s and out’s of my week so far..
Weekend was fun. Had a get together with my buds n few stragglers for a movie, munch n downer… Don’t worry I don’t mean we were together to get depressed! Nope.. We can do that on our own… Get together to try and have some fun! Someone brought a pirate version of Bridesmaids over to watch.. That is awesome!! It feels and looks like a chick flick but really it can appeal to all to be fair. I’m not one for flicky kinda movies but i was in tears watching this! Even if the quality wasn’t as great as would have liked. Pirate! heehee
Monday – Have been at work as usual and wished I had stayed in bed..! Felt like it was going on FOREVER!! I mean, honestly how long can an 8 hour shift take really!? 8 hours..? NAH!! More like 24!!! It really felt like Monday was THE lonnnngest day of my life…… So as soon as I got home it felt like I hadn’t been home for a few weeks! My bed was sooo calling me.. Got in n vegged out in front of the TV. That was great but before I knew it, it was nearly midnight! So turned off n dosed of.. Eventually!
Tuesday – Well another average day to be fair. Which I was glad about really I was. got home from work, chatted quite a bit with few people online and got some bits done as well. Oh, have been reading up on something my friend has been updating on Saucy Undies Fan Page that there is new items on offer now.. and if you add the most friends to the Group by the end of today then you could win a yummy prize!!! Something I believe I may want myself!!! LOL
Today – Well eventually got on here!! LOL Got half day today so no work this morning but this afternoon will be in 1 – 6pm unless there are some parents whoa re running late… always the case! some are more prone to stopping than others.. Habit more than anything else. I do not understand why parents bring their children in from 7.30am and leave them in till way after 6pm knowing the times of the nursery being open.. We have to get overtime for them being late and it being on  purpose.
Well do think it is time to get on with a few things now.. chat soon

Dull n Rainy Day..

Hey… 3 Days in a row… God I REALLY am feeling poorly!

Today is my day off from work.. and loving the fact that i am! Cos it is horrid outside with stormy weather after the lovely heat and humidity last week or so. Well that just means that the air is electric and will have lovely Lightening tonight.. Do love a great storm in the evening! And to clear the sticky air too.. love it!

Well, today i have been getting a few things done around the house.. Clothes washed and dried and put away, tidy up few things and even got few bits done online too! Emails mainly to reply to and messages on some of my profiles.. Well a woman has to get things done while she is in the mood.. as once the mood changes, that is it! Nothing will get done..

 

Ugh…. now my mood has suddenly changed for the worse… poxy horrid rain in the day spoils anything really! But do prefer it in the evening so can soothe me in the evenings and the show is always epic!!

Well, think I had best get something to eat now… hhmm healthy..? or Unhealthy…?!? Decisions.. lmao!!

Second Day In A Row!

OMG!!! Must be feeling ill or something.. I’m back here again second night in a row! heehee!!

So tonight I have had my Bestie Kat and she is having a few problems with her other half.. Men!! I do hate seeing her so low about anything.. and with how things have been going, doesn’t give me much hope for the outlook being bright.

But we have been chatting and I have been trying to reassure her that things could still be ok.. Really tried to sound more convincing than I might do on here… Although, yeah you guessed it. Not really holding my breath.. She has been through this 2wice before and it happened to be something HIS end! Typical really.. Why is it men happen to be taking on the Woman’s role and becomes more and more emotional and mind screwy!?? Really not on!!

Really have been a bit down tonight now have had that chat with Kat. Do hope that she eventually sees sense ad leave him for good and stop putting up with the shit she gets from him!

Right.. Really want to write more but mind is a blanc right now.. So off to sort few bits out and bed… eventually! Night..

Sorry To Say…

I have found something to be occupying my time recently and really have slacked on here..

Life eh..? Sucks to be fair!!

Well how to go about it now then… Shall we start from the top?

Well right now I am working still at nursery.. Don’t think could ever give that up really as I love children but not ready to have my own. So looking after someone else’s and giving them back at the end is great!  

Flower.. Distant memory to be fair… she was sorting herself out but never got back to me about us… if there ever could have been anything there anyway! So just haven’t bothered her about it really.. and not a peeps out of her!

Lovely Lady from Amsterdam well there is something fun there..! We chat on a PM app on mobile and can use internet access to chat to each other. We have been having quite a bit of fun recently and she has been getting more and more adventurous with her camera..!

have been eagerly enjoying my phone going off really.. And knowing it has been getting very hot literally melts my phone in my hand at times!! OOH yes it has been very hot indeed!!

And with her being in a different country I feel comfy to experiment more and she enjoys the eager flirt or more lol!!

I’ve bee helping my friend with her site… now has 2! lol

So here is something I’ve been helping with.. I’m quite fancying buying it myself!! heehee!! Looks good to be fair. Click the pic to check out other things that are sold on the new site.. Smellies and toys for the Ultimate Big Kid!

 

Well, will try and not leave it two months this time!! God where has the year gone too!!?

 

Tour Through TopGadge.co.uk

Getting on with it..

Have been enjoying myself these past few weeks.. Helping a friend out with her new website. Soon to get a T-shirt to wear and help promote it! YAAY will post a piccy of me in it! ;-)

Right you are.. here is the low down to what has been going on..
I haven't heard from ym friend Flower for a long time... thinkshe has not been on for ages and not responding to my emails or messags.. so think that is a lost cause.. :-(

But have met another lovely lady from Amsterdam who has been very lovely!! lol I thing with the fact I had that brief experience before, I'm starting to want to have some fun with a woman... nothing serious as I haven't been with a woman before, but do like the idea of it!

We ahve been enjoying our chts alot and flirting is becoming more and more intense.. at times sending nice pics to eachother.. heehee But soon enough it could get serious and I am getting myself ready for that to come... Doubt it as she is in a different country! But you never know.. Optimistic really!! not always good as you never know if will like it or not..


Well time for bed... have been busy bee this weekend.. Nothing to do!! LOL Night all

Holidays n Such...

It is now May and have missed nearly a month of blogging!!

Life has been very hectic in the past month or so... Holidays, friends staying over and often out most of the time.. ooh... and every so often would dart on and off Ro2 to get my clicks in and some lines.. hee hee!!

Righteo have to go tot work now... and hospital for Phsio... Lovely!! Hope they dont tell me off about my back.. not my fault!!

OMG!!! Sorry.... being too good at being bad!

I have been soo busy with life and such that my blog really has slacked.. Then, Virus!! flaming laptop would freeze up and not let me do anything to try adn fix it.. So I had to ring helpline to get it fixed and they tried all sorts. And then as last reort had to reset everything... EVERYTHING!!

I tried to save as much as I could... but didnt have enough memory cards.. :-( And then remembered AFTER i reset my laptop.. I didn't save any of my links saved on my browser.. oh dear!

so I have had to try and remember everythign all over again.. Luckily, having some sites emailing me i Have them sent to me and I can go to the links and save them again! Oh dear... it has been too much!! 2 years of updates to catch up on as well as uploading all sorts to get my laptop to how it used to be... It is going to take me a while! But I am determined..

I have been on my fave chat room..

Here I have earned quite a bit of cash since joining and recently upgraded for 1 month of premium membership cost me $10.95 and so far have earned over $7 so in a week have practically earned back most of the money back!! With PTC there also and Percentage points boosting my earnings per line typed, I have been earning quite a bit back from doing around 200-300 lines a day.

But since having probelms with Laptop, I have been trying to get on but have been off for a few days... so had to make up lost time... Which has been hard so far with doing constant updates...

And i miss my Flower... :'-( havent chatted mich with her since her message before. Just been scared, pre-occupied and a little worried about what i may get back.. She hasn't messaged me back either but she probably thinks that I am not interested... really don't knwo eachother that well btu do hope she can figure that I will eventually get back to her soon xx

Frustration!!

Now I am really upset... My day off and find that I cannot get into chat... no idea why but it won't let me in... my profile is still there as I looked me up on the profile viewers.. But it doesnt like me! :-(

Was able to contact the admins on the website and will await their reply... do hope that it isnt just me.. As it maybe that I am banned and without any notice... not nice at all.. i haven't done anything! ggrr... not happy now!

Going to be lazy today.. was going to try and enjoy my day but been having a bad week so far.. and could be getting worse!


Oh god I'm getting off here before I end up screwing things up on here as well!!

Go For It...!

I have just finished work.. Staff meetings at a nurseries can be an experience! Lol!!
So, been thinking about Flower.. I'm going to reply to her message as soon as I get in.. And get a drink.. Maybe a sandwich.. And relax 4a bit.. NO! Get in an go straight to my laptop and get it sent!
God! My tummy is trying to break out frm my abdomin!
Proper nervous now!

Still Putting It Off..

Have not been able to bring myself to send a message back to Flower.

What do I say? Shall I take a chance? Do I leave it to just online friendship?
Now am just an arse! I will do it! Just say what is needed to be said!

Later...

Sent It

I have sent a message to Flower... And waited for a reply... few hours past and nothing. So just carried on with chores around the internet.. Being away fro a while I do have a few bits to do..!

So just as I was looking back on my messages and I find one from... guess who?

"Hello my luvv..
I have been getting myself sorted out, knowing that you would be a bit busy with your life, I wanted to get straight. Ex gf has been wanting me back. I am really not wanting that again.. Love is just not there anymore.. And I am now truely over her. 
I haven't heard from her in a few days and now finally enjoying mingle life, I have still had you in my mind. Really odd but you truely are a great person to know and would love to meet you to get to know you more as a person than through the internet.. hee hee!! 
Nothing like finding a new great friend!! xx"

So right now.... I am sat here writing this and not sure what to say back to her... I know she feels the same I have been... hence the cool off. But I don't want to find out that i don't say or do anything and lose potentially a great friend if nothing more than that!

Oh dear... What do I do..? All this thinking is making my tummy turn.. Really do need to go to sleep.. doubt I will get much tonight!

Righteo....!!

So, Have been away for a while, family problems. But Hopefully all sorted now and had to give my blog a new look...
What do you think?? I do have to say, it looks hottt!!

Right down to business... My chats with Flower have been non-exsistant right now, with family problems I haven't really been online much. Just checking emails and then off again more than anything else. But she hasn't really left my thoughts...

I believe that she is letting me get things sorted my end and maybe she is doing the same her end... Would be nice so then 'if' we were to meet then it would be properly. Not with baggage or mixed feelings etc. Well I hope for that...
Right now, I feel like ive got the whole world on my shoulders and dragging the world's baggage with me!

So apart from that, Things have been great! Few weeks ago I had a lookie into a competition on Forum Club. Which sounds like fun... Join the forum, Go to the competition Discussion and follow instructions to win CASH!!! EASY!! Making money online is not easy as many think you know.. So maybe if we all have some fun doing it, we can all win eventually!

Am currently thinking as been as I am on here, I might as well send Flower a message just saying hi.

Will she say hi back?
Will she tell me to go away?
What will she say?
Would she want to carry on the friendship?
Will she want it to go further?
Will she want to leave it as it is?

Now I am getting ahead of myslef here now... But with things going on and not hearing anything or evan saying anything to her... What do you expect??